Hunger

This weekend at church, our pastor gave a great illustration that I wanted to share. He talked about how every person was created with a God-shaped void in their heart. One can never be truly happy, joyful or fulfilled until that void is filled. And the thing is that it can only be filled with one thing, one Person.

He then gave the illustration of being physically hungry. When you are hungry, you often want or crave a certain thing. When you go to the pantry or fridge to get that certain snack, and find that it is not there, you will devour anything you can find. Well, when that doesn't hit the spot, you will move onto something else, until something satisfies that hunger. Often going through ice cream, chips, cookies etc, when what you really want is just some chocolate.



The same is true in our relationship with God. We all have a desire to know God, to be in communion with God. Many times we don't know what it is that we need to satisfy that hunger or need, so we go through all sorts of things to try and fill that void. We may try relationships/friendships, certain sports, alcohol, drugs, distractions such as television/movies/internet, our spouses, and dare I say, our children and our roles as "mommy".

All of that stuff may make us happy for a season, or make us think we are happy. Some of those things listed above are extremely important in our lives. But the truth is that one day those things, those relationships, those roles that we play will bring us heartache, or disappointment. Until we find complete satisfaction, joy and contentment in Jesus, we will always be at the pantry looking for the next "snack" to devour. Until we learn that our joy, contentment, and fullness are not dependant on our circumstances and those around us, but on our awesome, unchanging Heavenly Father, we will continue to search for that missing piece, trying in vain to fill it on our own with temporary, earthly things.

So what/who are you holding on to today? What/who are you relying on to bring you happiness? What/Who is satisfying you today?

Mind your Own Business...

No, this isn't a post telling you to mind your own business. It's actually the post in which God tells me to mind my own business.

Don't you just LOVE when you go to God with a very specific request or a very specific issue that you are struggling with. And then He faithfully answers you with a VERY specific answer!!

This week, actually the past few weeks, I had been REALLY stressing about some issues that didn't directly affect me or my family, but somethings that I was concerned about nonetheless. Please bear with me, because I can't give details, just wouldn't be right, and it would just be gossiping. But these were situations that were inappropriate. And I really felt like someone should say something. I prayed and prayed, lost sleep, talked to my husband, almost scheduled a meeting with a pastor at my church, I was really stressing.

God kept telling me to go to His Word. And to be completely honest, I put it off because I didn't want to do what I thought He was going to tell me to do. Ephesians 5:11-13 kept coming to mind:

11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them. 12 For it is shameful even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret. 13 But all things that are exposed are made manifest by the light, for whatever makes manifest is light.

and I didn't want to ruffle feathers or make enemies. But at the same time, I felt compelled that these things needed to be brought to light. So I didn't read the Bible for several days. Spiritually, I crossed my arms and stuck out my bottom lip and pouted. I was confused.

Then I began to pray for peace. I began to pray for a gentle and quiet spirit, and a teachable heart. Then I went to God's Word.

On Thursday, I read 1 Timothy 2:1-4:

1Therefore I exhort first of all that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks be made for all men, 2for kings and all who are in authority, that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and reverence. 3 For this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior, 4 who desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.

On Friday I read 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12:

But we urge you, brethren, that you increase more and more; 11 that you also aspire to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you 12 that you may walk properly toward those who are outside, and that you may lack nothing.

So, in order to have that peace that I asked God for, I first needed to pray for those that I thought were doing wrong, not only that, but to give thanks for them. Then I just needed to mind my own business and go about my own work. God's Word is just amazing!

Mary Sundays

Historically, at our house, Sundays have been used for getting ready for the week. It was when the grocery shopping was done, the laundry was caught up, the school uniforms were gotten ready for the week, other chores that I needed to get done to get ready for the busy week of school. The thinking was that, if I could get all this stuff done on Sunday, the week would run more smoothly, which is logical thinking, right?

But at the beginning of this school year, God starting working in my heart to change this behavior. Everything I read for a while had something to say about keeping the Sabbath, or making the Sabbath a day of rest, etc. I began to see that my well-meaning attitude of working diligently to stave off chaos throughout the week, was preventing myself and my family from having a day of rest, a day of spending time with each other. It was just like any other day, just a busy, just as chaotic.

Then as I began to read Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World, I immediately asked myself, "How can I apply this to my life?". I understood the concept and what a wonderful one it was. But I was so task-oriented that I couldn't even imagine what a Mary heart looked like when it was lived out. I began to pray about this and God really put it on my heart that it needed to start with Sundays. I needed to work diligently throughout the week, so that we could be together as a family without the worries of getting chores done before Monday. And, of course, to spend time with Him without all the usual distractions.

It took me a while to get it together enough to pull off a Sunday with no to-do list. I had to start trying to complete some chores during the week. I had to do more on Saturdays. But I knew that once those needed tasks were completed, I was going to do nothing the next day. I don't know about you, but it is RARE that I do nothing.

As a matter-of-fact, the very first Sunday that I was able to put this into practice was one Sunday when Cecil was out of town with work. The house was clean, we went to church, the kids and I had just eaten a simple lunch, the school bags even been packed on Sat. night and were ready for the next morning. I sat on the sofa and put the Saints game on with the kids. I'm not kidding you when I say that two minutes passed and tasks that I should be doing started creeping into my head: Martha thinking...

"You could be organizing your closet",

"You need to go through the kids' clothes and get rid of what's too small",

"You never got around to cleaning the floor in your bathroom".

I had to really make a conscious effort to sit and do nothing, to not be "productive". The kids and I played some games, I read a little and had a wonderful, relaxing day. It really made a difference in that next week, too. I felt less frazzled, calmer.

It's still a learning process, I'm still trying to get it "right". As a matter-of-fact, I do have some laundry that has to be done today. But it's definitely worth the extra effort during the week. And next week I will just try a bit harder and be a bit more diligent.

By the way, I highly recommend this book. It completely changed and is changing my thinking, my attitude( that still needs some work) and my heart. It was truly an answered prayer.

Just something I've been learning...

Just some thoughts on what God has been showing me...

When the Jews were rebuilding their temple after being released from Babylonian captivity, the Samaritans used several tactics to hinder the building of the temple; tokeep the Jews from doing God’s work, from doing something that was pleasing to God.

One thing they used was accusations. They sent letters to the King of Babylon accusing the Jews of doing something wrong. They falsely accused the Jews of rebuilding the walls around Jerusalem to fortify their city in order to make it powerful again. This was, of course, false. They were only concerned with rebuilding their Temple so that they could worship. They were only concerned with honoring God and doing God’s work. They were, in addition, following king’s orders, as Kind Cyrus had ordered them to return to their homeland and to rebuild the Temple. He even gave them necessary tools to do so. This reminds me that just as Satan used the Samaritans here to discourage and falsely accuse God’s people of wrong or impure actions or motives, Satan, clearly, still uses these tactics to this day. Often times, sadly, those false, hurtful accusations come from other Christians or church family, which is, I believe, even more hurtful than if they came from those that you know are not Christians.

The Jews stopped working on the Temple for 16 years after the Samaritans, with the help of the current king, used fear and intimidation to hinder their obedience to God. The Samaritans lost faith and got discouraged, which is often what we do when we are faced with others who have falsely accused us. The fact of the matter is that Satan hates God’s work, and when you are doing God’s work, Satan is looking for ways to stop it. Discouragement and fear are two very effective tools that Satan uses to accomplish this goal. Unfortunately, he often uses other Christians to plant these feelings. I can tell you from experience that there is no better way to discourage someone than to speak lies and spread false accusations.

The application of this principle in my life is two-fold, as is the lesson that God slammed me with this morning. On one hand, as a person who chooses to follow God and wakes up each morning and prays that I will live each day in a way that is pleasing to my Savior, I know that I will be attacked by Satan. And Satan may use others to attack me. If I allow this to discourage me, this is a lack of faith. I have to remember that whatever God commands, He always backs up with his own power .

One the other hand, I have to be aware that at any time, Satan could try and use me in his plan to hinder others. I have to be vigilant and careful about the things that I listen to, or say to others. Am I listening to gossip that could possibly be used to discourage someone or hurt someone? Am I spreading gossip that could discourage or hurt someone? We have to be conscious of the spiritual warfare going on constantly and to realize that just because we are Christians, doesn’t mean we are exempt from the pressures of Satan ; it is often more effective for him if he can get us to do his work for him. I, personally, don’t want to be Satan’s go-to person when he needs a job done. I want to live and walk in a way so that I am God’s go-to person when he wants a job to be done.

Thoughts on Being a Working Mom

So, I wrote that I have been taking a break from blogging....from writing blogs and from reading blogs. I also wrote that I may one day blog about why this break has been good for me. So, I think today's a good day! I'm not sure if I'm "back" but here are some of my latest thoughts.

Many of the blogs I have read, are those of stay-at-home, homeschooling moms. I don't know why that is or what brought me to those blogs. But I do read quite a few blogs of working moms, as well. Over the past few months, I have become increasingly discouraged about certain things in my life. Namely, the fact that I work outside the home, that I don't homeschool my kids.


One thing that I know about myself is that I'm brutally judgemental of myself. And I, way too often, compare myself to other people, thinking that they do ____(fill in the blank) better than I do. I was looking to these blogs, more importantly, to the women who write these blogs, and thinking that I don't measure up. That I'm doing this "mom thing" all wrong...that my children are getting short-changed. That I'm out of God's will for my life, because these Christian women say that if I am not at home, homeschooling my children, then I'm not fulfilling God's plan, I'm not doing what God intended a wife and mother to do.


This was a big deal. It sent me into a bit of a tailspin, affected my relationship with my husband, and made me doubt who I was as a mother.


So I quit. I quit reading their blogs, the ones that told me I was likely sinning against God by holding a teaching job. And I started reading God's word. And do you know what, when I am in God's Word, not other people's blog business, I get clearer answers of what I am supposed to be doing for my family. I now have such a peace about our situation, there has been virtually no stress over the past few weeks, compared to what I felt over this summer, when I wasn't working.

I do firmly believe that God puts godly people in our lives to speak to us, give us insight, affirm our choices, etc. And have had clear evidence of that recently, when dealing with other important decisions. However, I also know that the one true place to find answers in the choices that you have to make is in the Word of God, and that is what I have been doing and it's great.


Now I see that the uncertainty that I was feeling in whether or not I was doing the right thing working outside the home was not a God issue, so much as it was an issue of me feeling judged, judged by people who are Christians, people whose belief systems, for the most part, line up with mine. And that's hard, no matter who you are. There was a time, that I believed that the feeling that I got reading their stong, opinionated, almost-condescending words was the Holy Spirit convicting me and leading me in the way that I should go. But now I realize that if I'm immersed in studying the Word and am not feeling the conviction of the Holy Spirit, then that was not what it was.


Please do not read this and think that I am speaking against SAHMs or homeschooling in any way. Hear me loud and clear when I say that I have great friends and an awesome sister who are at home with their children teaching them. And if that's what God called us to do, we would do it. However, that is not the ONLY way to raise healthy, happy, God-loving, people-respecting children. What I am speaking out against is the condescending, unloving, judgemental attitude that some working moms get from other moms. There are some things in life that are black-and-white, universally wrong for every person...murder, adultery etc. This is NOT one of those issues.

We are all mommas, and working mommas love our babies just as much as SAHMs love theirs (believe it or not, I've seen it argued that we do not). I'm not sure why there is even a "division" between the two, but there is. Wouldn't it be great if we could all be "just moms".

Over the past few weeks, I've settled into the realization that there is but one standard that I have to strive to live up to and that is the one of my God, not that of any "mommy blogger".

A Break

School started last week and we've been busy with dancing, piano, and all the other things that go along with going back to work. I've been taking a bit of a break from blogs and it's been good for me. I haven't even read a single blog in about 2 weeks. And that too has been good for me. Maybe one day I'll blog about how that is, but right now I'll continue the break and just focus on settling into our routine.

Add a Bit of Chocolate

We all get busy. I know that, I don't think for a second that I am any busier than any other mom out there. Okay, who am I kidding, I have four children. So yeah, I'm busier than a mom with only one or two but that's not the point. I know life gets crazy for everyone. When things start getting crazy for us, I feel like we are treading water, just trying to make it to the next day. Doing just what needs to be done to coast on by. It's easy to lump the kids in with all the other chores that need to be done (I know, that's not going to win me any Mother-of-the-Year Awards). But I'm being totally honest. It gets to the point sometimes when I feel like we walk in the door, do homework, supper, baths and bed...over and over and over and over. I guess it's a good thing that our routines are in place but it gets sort of montonous at times. And I just focus on checking off my to-do list.

I have been reading Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver for a couple of weeks now and boy, is it challenging me...in a great way! One thing I read today was actually an exerpt that she quoted from another book but it absolutely went straight to my heart.

Duty can pack an adequate sack lunch, but love may decide to enclose a little love note inside...Obligation sends the children to bed on time, but love tucks the covers in around their necks and passes out kisses and hugs (even to teenagers!)...Duty gets offended quickly if it is isn't appreciated, but love learns to laugh a lot and to work for the sheer joy of doing it. Obligation can pour a glass of milk, but quite often, love adds a little chocolate.

Do you sometimes need to reexamine your heart place? I know I do! Yes, I can get all the chores checked off my list. But if it isn't done in love, is it truly blessing my family? If I only do the things that I do out of obligation or duty, to just coast on by to the next day, does that truly make my family feel loved? I find that when I reevaluate my motives and ask God to help me to lovingly bless my family, I often reap rewards myself; rewards in hearing my daughter say, "Mommy, you are the best mommy I could ever ask for". Or hearing my son say,"Mommy, you're beautiful", or "Mommy, you're da best mommy ever". It's in those moments that I know they feel loved.

So, next time at dinner, instead of hurriedly fixing four little glasses of milk, maybe I'll slow down a bit and give them all a bit of chocolate.

Lunch Box Ideas

A friend and I were discussing the daunting task of coming up with ideas of what to pack for our kids for lunch. Our school does not have a lunch program, so the kids bring their lunches every day, except Friday when the school order pizza. So I set out to find some interesting, quick, easy lunches for my kids, so that they are not stuck eating turkey sandwiches every day.

Here is one lunch idea that I though was just adorable.

Corn Dog Muffins

What you need:

2 (8.5 ounce) packages cornbread mix
2 tablespoons brown sugar
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups milk
1 cup grated Cheddar cheese
9 hot dogs, cut in half

What you do:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C). Lightly grease muffin tins.
Stir together the cornbread mix and the brown sugar in a large bowl. Whisk the eggs and milk in a small bowl until smooth. Fold the eggs and cheese into the dry mixture until moistened. Spoon mixture into muffin tins until 2/3 full. Add 1 hot dog half to each muffin.
Bake in a preheated oven 14 to 18 minutes, or until golden brown.

source for recipe and picture: allrecipes.com

School Dream

Had a dream last night about the beginning of school.



It was morning time, we were all rushing around the house (rushing is probably an understatement). Lunches to pack, couldn't find my clothes, much less all the kids' clothes. Cecil was trying to help, I was crying. School bus showed up, we missed it. (The kids don't actually ride the school bus, but I guess it just added more stress to my dream).



Next morning, same thing. Something spills on my clothes. School bus arrives, David has no shoes or socks on, can't find his shoes. So I just send him in socks, girl socks no less. I broke down, literally sobbing that I can't do this.



I was up at 2:30 am with my stomach in knots because of this dream. I know that the beginning of school is no big deal, really. But wondering what this all means. I really feel anxious this year, although not as anxious as my dream. Not sure why.

Dinner Tonight

Didn't do a menu this week. We had so much food in the house from the week before. I actually didn't make half of what was on the menu for last week. So we're eating what we have. It's Wednesday and I haven't been to the store since last week. A huge accomplishment for us. We don't have bread or milk in the house. Maybe I should get milk for the babes, but they haven't missed it thus far. And I'm considering making a loaf of bread, for toast and such, just to avoid going to the store.

Making Baked Teriyaki Chicken for dinner tonight. Would really love some zucchini or broccoli to have with it. But we're eating what's here. So, green beans it is.

Here's the recipe I'm using:
(adapted from a recipe from Allrecipes)

1 Tbs cornstarch
1 Tbs cold water
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup cider vinegar
1 clove garlic, minced
black pepper
4 boneless skinless chicken breasts

Combine all sauce ingredients, simmer until it thickens.
Put chicken in a greased dish, brush chicken with sauce on both sides.
Bake at 450 for 20 minutes. Turn chicken, brush again, and bake for another 10 minutes.

Sounds yummy doesn't it!